Hi,
Thanks for your response to 'The Indian Wedding'. I received some responses which said that the post was good but lacked an end. Through this post I wish to cross that bridge. I actually am going to try and reach a solution which can work out quite well and have the virtues of both the sorts of marriages.
In 'The Indian Wedding', I had given my views on how the 'arranged' and 'love' marriages fundamentally differ. To get the benefits of both, the family and the bride and groom have to work together to achieve desired 'output'. I can suggest 3 solutions here:
i. The two families try to work it out after the 'lovers' have decided to marry.
ii. After 'arranging' a marriage, the families give the boy and girl some time (around 6 months?) to know each other better.
iii. The lovers are from families that know each other for quite some time and are quite comfortable with each other.
Let us take each proposed solution and discuss them individually. First one is sometimes too good to be true but if it works out, I don't think anything could be better. The next one does not guarantee a solution, it is more or less like a prayer which may or may not come true. They will of course get to know each other and decide on what they feel about each other. But, ca the families wait for that long in an arranged marriage? Third one might be considered the safest. If you go down this path, you are most probably going to be happy yourself and also keep others happy. These are possible solutions I could come up with and as you see there is too much of 'chance' involved. So, get lucky!
4 comments:
Very good solutions you have given I think the last one is the best solution if it is really implemented but now a days I think every boy or girl loves someone . So every one wants to marry with one’s loved ones and parents of today are also very generous they easily accept the choice of their children . But love marriages are also breaking at a fast pace . I think after some time our country will also become like Western countries where marriage and divorce is like a child’s play . Live in relationship has already spread its root in metros . We don’t know in which direction we are going .
Anyway we have to welcome the change whatsoever
Rohit Das
yaar kya love marriage aur kya arranged marriage...mera to koi bhi marriage ka koi chance nazar nahi aa raha..lagta hai apne marriage ke liye humko heavy dowry dena padega... :((((
-Swastik
sahi Kush..you made a complex problem really simple..interesting was the thought that it was getting late of your train which led you to think about this..i think the problem is bigger than anticipated.sometimes 'individuals' start well just to discover soon that they were not as compatible as they thought to be.Same can happen with the 'families' and INDEPENDENCE being the attitude of the century,you got to have divisions.
The last solution gives a ray of hope.But we people are neither close to our families nor the family friends.All the family friends are getting married in front of our eyes...anyways let the music play..
@akshendra
Thanks for reading the blog and your comment. I did not really 'assume' that the problem is really that simple and such simple solutions can work for everyone. It is just the fact that I gave so little time to the issue. If I had given more time, maybe I could have come up with more solutions which would have been of some convenience to you too. However, the solutions I suggested have one major problem in implementation. Do you believe you can just love anyone you meet? Your family friends are getting married but even if they had not been, who can guarantee that you would have found love in one of them? Lastly, are we really not close to our parents? I think if today you get into some serious trouble they are the ones you will turn to and that does show how close you really are. I do not think we can ever create enough rifts with our parents that we can never depend on them for help and advice.
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